Being a parent

...is hard. It's that easy. That's a pretty good description of what we've been going through. 


Last Thursday Bowen started being extremely fussy. I mean crying all day fussy. I was scared that it was colic all over again rearing it's nasty head! He hadn't had a fever all day so I wasn't necessarily worried about him being sick. With Tate I still remember the moment that colic struck- Valentine's Day weekend. We had Derek and Jenny over to eat at the house and he let out a scream and that was his temperament for about a year. It was a really rough time for us. I felt so helpless and it was just all around frustrating. And I was fearing it was starting up all over again after we just got over it with one baby. 


So that night I was exhausted and upset that my poor, sweet baby was still miserable; however, he started to feel warm and when I checked his temp at midnight he had a low grade fever and by 3 am it had risen to 102! I was freaking out! I knew it was time to go to the emergency room. I had always heard not to go to Midland's hospital so I packed up Bowen and we went to Odessa. Trevor stayed at the house with Tate. When I got to the ER there was only one person in the waiting room so I was relieved that we might get in and out quickly- boy, was I wrong! We got called back and his fever was still rising-it was 102.2. They got us back into a room and then the onslaught of tests began. They came in and took blood from his little arm and started a line in his hand. It was awful hearing him scream in pain. Little did I know, it was only the beginning. 


They had to get a urine sample so then they catheterized him. As she was getting a sample, she SPILLED the dang sample! Most of it and there wasn't anymore urine and I was not about to let her do it again. Then the doctor came in and said that they would have to do a spinal tap to check for bacterial meningitis. I cried pretty much from the time I got there until that night but nothing was worse than when they did that spinal tap. His scream ripped through me like nothing had before. I still can hear that awful sound and I don't think I'll forget it. When they finally got done I got into the room and held him and tried to feed him but midway through the feeding he threw up all over me. This was not just spit up it was throw up! This couldn't get any worse. Again, I felt helpless for my poor baby.

Dad and Trevor were able to come to the ER and they admitted Bowen so we were moved to the pediatric unit of the hospital and Mom met us there. While we were there Lindsey Roby was kind enough to keep Tate so we didn't have to bring him to the hospital. Thank you again Lindsey! Mom took Tate home and he stayed with Trish and Victor for the weekend and was actually able to see his Aunt Cait for a couple days and go to the zoo! I was happy that he was enjoying his time but I missed him. For the next 3 days we were confined to the dark, cold hospital room with Bowen's little arm attached to the IV. They would check his temperature, give more meds, and do heel pricks. To put it simply, it sucked! But on Monday we were finally released to go home. It was so nice to finally have some normalcy and feel like he was doing better; however, now I feel like he is so fragile. I'm nervous that he might get sick again and we not know why. It's a terrible feeling and I'm praying that he and Tate will just be healthy. I feel like we've been through so much and I'm just tired of it always being something. I'll just keep praying and hoping for healthy, happy kids. I guess that's all I can do.

Baby Bowen

Our sweet Baby Bowen has arrived! We are so incredibly blessed! We have so much to be grateful for- a safe delivery, now 2 healthy baby boys, loving and supportive families, and now our new family of 4! 


It all started at my appointment on May 31st. It was my last prenatal appointment. I went in hoping that I had made some progress since the week before. I was so anxious to meet my little boy. Trevor was able to meet me at the doctor's office. When Dr. Fanous checked me I was at 4 cm and 70% effaced. I was excited that I was further along but knew that I could still go for a little longer. He also said my bag of water was bulging just a little and that he really didn't see me lasting until Monday; however, if I did I was scheduled for induction at 5 am on Monday June 6th, my due date. I really didn't want to be induced but knew that if it was necessary to keep the baby safe then I would be okay with it. 


Since Gigi and Papa were keeping Tate after the appointment Trevor and I went to Red Lobsters to eat before we went home. That night we went for a walk and then just took it easy. When we got into bed we were talking about what Bowen might look like and how anxious we were. At 11:45 I felt like I might be having a contraction. It didn't hurt which was completely unlike how my contractions were with Tate. I asked Trevor what time it was and then 5 minutes later there was another one. Then all of a sudden I felt like my water was leaking. I rushed to the bathroom and sure enough my water had broken- at least a little. I told him that I hope that was the case or I might've just peed myself and that would just be embarrassing. I came back into the room and told Trevor it was time. It was completely different than with Tate. The first time I was nervous and scared. This time it felt so much more relaxed and just exciting. 


We loaded everything up and got on the road but decided to get something from McDonalds because we knew it would be a long time before we would get to eat again. When we got to the hospital it was around 12:30. We walked up to the second floor to labor and delivery. It was a really busy night for the unit and there was only one room left-lucky us! As we were being led back to the room more of my water broke! It was a little embarrassing and all I could do was laugh. I was glad that at least I was at the hospital and I wasn't in public because it looked like I peed myself haha. When we got to the room I got dressed in the gown and was hooked up to all the machines to check my vitals and the baby's. The nurse checked me and I was at 5 cm and, sure enough, my water had broke and we were on our way to having our baby! 


I was so tired. That's the only bad thing about going into labor at night. Once you get into that room it is impossible to sleep for more than 2 hours at a time without a nurse checking progress or a machine making noise, etc. Around 3 Mom and Dad got there. I was really surprised because up to this point my contractions were pretty painless. By 5 am the nurse checked me and I was not progressing. I had been stuck at 5 cm for 5 hours now. I was disappointed because at this point they were going to start me on Pitocin. I'm really against Pitocin but I knew that my doctor was looking out for our best interest and wouldn't be pushing something that wasn't safe for us. So I agreed. I was really going to try to go as long as possible without any pain medication-and up to this point I hadn't needed any pain management but I knew that as soon as they started the Pitocin things would get really bad really fast so I got the epidural.
I was a little frustrated because when the nurse came in to get me ready for the epidural wouldn't let me use the restroom before I got the epidural and I felt like I was about to pee myself but the anesthesist was in a hurry so I just went with it. Hey, if she wanted to clean up pee then that's her problem but it made getting the shot a little harder. I hate epidurals because I don't like not being able to feel anything. The numbness just isn't natural and it's a little scary. I wasn't in pain during contractions or in labor so it did it's job but I was completely numb for over 12 hours! 


I was still not progressing even with the Pitocin for hours! I was getting really frustrated and more and more tired because I couldn't get any rest. I had to be on oxygen because Bowen was having some dips in heart rate and we kept trying different positions to get him comfortable. They said that his cord was probably wrapped around his neck, which scared me! Around 11 the nurses woke me up and said I was ready to push and they started preparing the room. Suddenly everything went so fast. I had prepared myself for a long delivery like with Tate; however, with just 4 pushes Bowen was born at 11:34 am! I don't know if it was my motivation to get him out so we could get him unwrapped from his cord or if it was just that my body had been through it before and knew what to do. Either way I was one happy Mama to see my baby boy! He was just as beautiful as I thought he would be. He was unwrapped, the cord was around his neck and arm, and then he was cleaned, weighed, and warmed up. He weighed 7 pounds 10.8 ounces and was 21 inches. He had a slight cone head but by the end of the day it had already gone down, unlike Tate's which took some time haha. 


Trish and Victor arrived with big brother Tate. He didn't really seem to care about little brother at first and was more interested with running through the curtain in the room and making everyone laugh. But ever since he's been wanting to kiss and hug baby brother non-stop! It's the cutest thing! I didn't know how he would react but I'm so glad that he's happy about brother. The only time it's hard is when they are both crying and want me to hold them and when Tate wants to play but Bowen needs to be fed or held. I'll figure out the balance it's just going to take some time.


The first day went by so fast and we were home by 3 or so the next afternoon. Bowen was not happy that he had to be put in a carseat and cried most of the way home. When we got home he just snuggled and slept for the most part. He likes to sleep on me and is so serene and peaceful but he doesn't like to be put in his bassinet. I tried to get in some snuggle time with him now because babies don't stay for long. Before I know it he'll be running around like his big brother.




Now for pictures

 Arriving at the hospital

 Right before I started to push

 And he's here!

 Tate arrives to check out his new baby brother

Proud grandparents 

Tate showing everyone his brother's eyes...oh my! haha 

Sweet baby boy 

Grandaddy and Baby Bo 

bundled up 

Tate likes to pet his baby brother  

Running around being silly  

Running through the curtains and giggling 

 He was so hungry so we gave him a bottle before they headed out for lunch and he came and laid with me for a little bit

 He's beautiful!

Gigi and Papa admiring little Bowen 

So peaceful

10 little fingers 

and 10 little toes 

baby blue eyes 

Grammy checking out Bo 

getting some sugar in 

I couldn't quit staring at him. I just love him! 

 Pictures for the online nursery at the hospital

On our way home. It was funny, Trevor actually had on his scrubs on the way home just like with Tate! How ironic. 

 Sleepy boy

 He is so sweet

 Catching some zzz's! Thanks Grammy for all your help!

Proud daddy!


Thank you to all my amazing family for all your continuous love and support. Trish and Victor, I appreciate you helping so much with Tate. I know he enjoyed his time at the ranch and with ya'll! Mom and Dad thanks so much for your help since Bowen's birth. I've enjoyed spending time with ya'll and don't know how I would've managed without ya'll there helping me out constantly with Tate and feeding us :-) I really don't know how I could've been more blessed. I'm very grateful that I have ya'll in our lives. I love you!